Sometimes you have to work, sometimes you have to eat, and sometimes you just need to sit the fuck down and let your fingers communicate your words on keys to a screen. Give the world a taste of the words that are scrolling fast through the front of your eyes like a marquis displaying the best bargains in town. Well, here it is, the best Breezy in town, sweet with a sour aftertaste....to some folks. Every time I want to sit down and write I get side-tracked. I always want to watch something or play something, read something or listen to something, or eat something, or drink something...... or smoke something.(I'll leave that to your wild imaginations) So many things that I have to choose from. Life is full of choices, seems like everyone says that, but it is. One of life's truest statements. Right now, at this very moment, I'm choosing to type, to sit in my desk chair that has a slightly comfortable lean to it, to watch the t.v. out of my side-vision, just so I can see the movements of the ultimate fighters that are almost dancing to the Chopin that I am choosing to guide me in the flow of my words. Like my name, I flow.
A few months have gone by since I've last wrote and I apologize, mostly to myself. As a human enjoying this life, it is of my choosing to decide what happens by the choices I make. Choices, choices. I am struggling with my choice to write this blog and fighting the other part of my brain that is begging me to pick up the paperback and watch from afar as Anastasia Steele tries to piece together the "fifty shades of fucked up" puzzle that is Christian Grey. That E.L. James sure knows what an 80's baby likes to feed her soul, and apparently soccer-moms from what I've read.
You are choosing to read this, dipping your toes into my brain-pool. Trust me, the waters fine. I think more people need to write. I think more people need to talk about who dwells inside and let the world know who you are, who knows, we might see each other for far more fascinating than the original perception. Unfortunately, so many people choose to lock themselves up, caging themselves. Let your soul sing, express yourself in the only way you know how because that's the agreement that your heart and mind shook on. Ugh, this piano is making me sappy, I want to cuss and talk about hairs that get stuck in the back of your throat during oral sex and make you almost throw up. (It's so funny when they think it's because of how big they are) ;) That was one for my ladies. See, when I type dirty words to a beautiful piano-piece it feels like I just spray-painted over the Mona Lisa. I choose to be raunchy yet classy. I choose to love. I choose to wear my boyfriends Adidas pants and a mis-matched long-sleeve shirt with my hair in a rat's nest on top of my head. I choose to tell you about my choice to be me. The battle that is truly good vs. girly-evil. I promise to do my best to be me, as long as you promise to just..... Be you.