Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Stressed to the 9's.

Brady suggested that I title a blog as such......our evening meet-up is usually spent of me blathering on about my hellacious work-day as an assistant property manager. I used the "stressed to the 9's" wording and he immediately said....."that's a blog-post"....so I'm gonna run(type) with it. Like I said...I'm an assistant property manager. Myself and my co-worker/teammate/1st in command try the best we can at wrangling a 460 unit property consisting of over 1,000 residents, 5 maintenance-techs, 15 caretakers, 10 corporate office/3 leasing members and on average 7-10 daily vendors.....and I can't keep track of how many times that my desk-phone rings and how many times that I answer a buzzer to let people in.....(seriously, I've tried to keep a record...was not even happening). I can't even remember what I was going to rant about.....I know it was pertaining to my job. But I feel like my mind is in an emotional-repair state...survivor-mode has kicked in and it's almost like my thoughts of the work day are evaporating.....or could that just be the exhale of my cigarette, soothing my nerves, killing me softly. Regardless, my day was intense. 
         I'm not good at holding in my opinion, especially in a case of injustice. The scales must be even, I am Libra....hear me roar. Imbalance truly affects me. Unfairness is a killer of happiness, and I'm shielding myself in the best way possible, trying to make everyone else happy while losing myself. I am not ashamed to say that I have been prescribed anti-depressants before because some wounds just don't heal, but I do not appreciate the effects of them, so I medicate herbally instead. Wanna judge me for cannabis consumption? Go ahead....I honestly do not care. A "substance" that has been medically proven to alleviate physical and mental pain. Since I received my promotion a little over a year after working in the leasing office and traveling to other properties as a "filler", I have focused so much on my job that I quit writing, quit making art, gained weight, stock-piled laundry, formed clutter everywhere, and have cried more times that I have in the past ten years. Shit's getting real.
          Thank God for Janelle Monae.....I'm a Queen too....and my scepter is rising....faster than slower.

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